I remember being creeped out by the opening sequence. I guess disembodied hands holding matches was a big frightening trigger for me. Don't judge.
The episode starts with a blindfolded kid being led rather forcefully towards the campfire. Virgin sacrifice? Unfortunately, no. The kid is Frank Moore, a hopeful inductee into the Midnight Society. Is it ever explained how the society was formed? Parental neglect, most likely. Anyway, Frank looks like a Frog brother reject. The kid with the glasses (I wish he'd introduce himself) explains the induction rules: Frank must stay blindfolded and tell a story. After the story, the members will vote. He needs a unanimous vote to be in the Society. Will he get in? So suspenseful.
Then Frank utters the magical words you've been waiting for: "Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this story... The Tale of the Phantom Cab"
...........
And the first thing we see is a pair of white Pump sneakers. Sexy. The sneakers belong to an older kid in jeans and sleeveless denim shirt...thing. His little brother is along and he's rocking a multi-colored backpack. Uh oh. The two brothers are lost. Apparently their names are Denny and Buzz, but I prefer to call them Big Douche and Little Bag. Night is falling fast and Big Douche keeps threatening physical violence. A flashlight shines in the distance. Are they saved? I kinda hope not.
The flashlight belongs to a rather pasty man in a baseball cap. His name's Flynn and he says he's a traveler. He also likes to laugh rather inappropriately and at rather frequent intervals. Flynn of the Creepy Laugh tells Little Bag and Big Douche that he will take them to someone who can help them, "The Good Doctor". Cue the mist.
One the way, Flynn tries to make small talk. "How are you guys at solving riddles?" he asks. Another example of small talk a la Flynn: obtuse talk about the high cost of getting help from the doctor. Flynn needs a handkerchief or something as his pasty skin also seems to be rather... damp.
The three travelers arrive at the Good Doctor's cottage. Flynn disappears!!! The doctor's door glows! Laughter is heard and the camera pans to a bush. Ok, I've heard of and accept a burning bush. But a laughing bush? That's going too far. Too far, I say. The brothers pound on the glowing door and the Dr. finally lets them in. Whoa, what a sexy, sexy man! He immediately launches into riddle talk and talk about "getting them warm." His name is Dr. Vink. Not Fink. Va Va Va Vink! He's pretty insistent about that.
Inside the Doctor's cottage are bubbling brews and Chemistry equipment. Figures. He does look kinda tweaked out. Guess his medical practice wasn't doing too well out in the middle of the woods. Meth production is always a good backup plan.
He's super sexy as he shows the brothers the brain of a wild boar. I'd hit that. (the doctor, not that brain). Oh, and he would like you to know he is not a "nut bag", so please stop spreading that rumor. K thanks.
Back to the riddle talk. What's up with that? Do you think it's a major plot point? I'm still undecided.
Oh no! Dr. Va Va Va Vink pulls out a massive pair of rusty hedge clippers! It's eunuch time!! He then says, "We play by my rules, or we don't play." Wow. Way to take your boar's brain and go home, good Dr.
Dr. V sets down the rules: if they solve the riddle they can call their parents (hey, the riddle talk was important. I'm shocked). If they don't solve it, he will show them the door and they can leave. Douche and Bag accept the challenge.
And the riddle is: "What is it that has no weight, can be seen by the naked eye, and if you put it in a barrel would make the barrel lighter?"
Bag and Douche both fail to solve the riddle. Seriously, they think for about .5 seconds and then give up. Way to go, kids! Dr. V gets depressed and tells them they know the way out. He also gives them directions that will take them to a spot in the woods where they can catch a cab.
The brothers are not amused by the idea of catching a cab in the middle of the woods. Dr. V senses this and tells them that there might be another way. They can leave a specimen. Oh Jeez! I love nothing more than a creepy, hairy, riddle-loving recluse. But, a creepy, hairy, riddle-loving, recluse into scat? Sorry, but that's a deal-breaker for me. Oh...wait. He wasn't talking about THAT kind of specimen. He meant a body part. That's a whole different story. I can live with that. Cue huge, bloated hand in a jar!
..........
Back at the campfire! The geniuses think the story was lame; the riddle was too hard. Frank Frog tells them to fuck off and let him finish the story. I love Frank. Keep your fingers crossed that he gets inducted!
............
Back to the woods and to the riddle hating brothers. They're lost again in the woods after fleeing from Dr. V. Will they ever make it out alive? Honk! Honk! A yellow taxi cab shows up. Yay! They're rescued!!
And off they go in the safety of the cab driven by Flynn, the driver of those who cannot solve the Dr.'s riddles. It turns out that Flynn also sucks at riddles. 40 years ago he couldn't solve a riddle and the Good Doctor took his hand as a result. Well, I hope he tried harder than Douche and Bag.
Oh, and by the way, Flynn is DEAD! I guess that explains the pasty, damp skin. And now he's going to kill the brothers in the same way he lost his life: crashing the cab into a tree. Remember kids, don't drive one handed!
Douche begs his brother to think, but his brother protests that it's hard to think about the solution to a riddle when one is being choked. True enough. I'll give him that one.
But of course he solves the riddle. The answer is HOLE. It's a fucking HOLE. The cab hits the tree. Flynn and the cab disappear and the brothers are saved. The curse is broken. Blah Blah Blah. A touching moment of brotherly love is interrupted by a grinning forest ranger who whisks them away to safety.
...........
Back to the campfire. Blindfolded Frank Frog is looking mighty smug. The rest of the Society exchange glances. Time to vote.
David: Yes
Kiki: Yes
Betty Ann: Yes
Kristen: Yes
Eric: Yes
Glasses Guy (OK, OK, his name is Gary): Yes
Woo! Frank Frog is in! Society members celebrate and Frank finally removes his blindfold.
I assume the binge drinking and crazy goat sex happens off camera, as all good hazing rituals should.
Grade: 4 bloated, formaldehyde-soaked hands out of 5
10 comments:
I used to get freaked out by the empty swing, swinging gently, yet creepily, in the playground at midnight. Glasses guy! I NEVER knew his name. Are you planning on doing the episodes in order, or what?
I LOVED this show! Thanks for bringing back the memories. I was always creeped out by it, but in a good way. My favorite one was the Prom ghost one... I can't remember the name of it though.
Also, thanks for linking my blog :D when I get up other sites, I'll be sure to return the favor.
I'm planning on doing the episodes in as much of a chronological order as I can. Right now I only have access to 65 of the episodes.
I completely forgot about this episode. For some reason I always thought the Tale of the Twisted Claw was episode 1. I don't think I could tell a whole story while blindfolded. I think I'd get too paranoid that people were staring at me.
I don't know whose name-pronunciation-insistence annoyed me more... Dr. Vink, with a Va-Va-Va, or Sardoh, no "Mr.," accent on the "doh." I hated both those characters.
The scariest part of this show for me was always that evil clown doll in the opening sequence.
Colleen: Tale of the Twisted Claw was the 4th spisode to air. However, it's the pilot episode, so it was the first episode filmed.
ahh. I don't know how I would've known that. Something is making me think that Twisted Claw aired as a special before the series began as a real series, kind of like that "How I Spent My Summer Vacation" episode of Pete and Pete, but I think I'm making that up. :)
Colleen: I just double checked. You're right. It did air before the official start of the series. It aired as a special on Halloween (1991? I think?). Then it was re-aired as the 4th episode. Good memory!
I love you guys. I am finally amongst friends. By the way, in the first episode where Gary's brother takes over leading the group, he explains that his brother brought his friends. It's kind of an explanation. Check out youtube for more AYAOTD videos, some girl posted a bunch of full episodes.
That is my post above, I clicked the wrong thing.
See, I never actually had Nickelodeon but then i found out about SNICK and this show and I watchd it on YouTube! YES! Go YouTube. Seriously? NO-ONE SOLVED THAT RIDDLE???? Yes, it was hard but on penalty of death? I think they could have before 40 years!!!!
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